poop pickup lines 1

Laugh Out Loud: Poop Pick-Up Lines and Jokes for Hilarious Fun!

Today, we have tried to come up with all of the Poop Pick Up Lines and it is going to be an excessive amount of fun for a few people and for others, there might be too much of comedy hawk and which may be vain for people because we’ve got loads of pick up lines on poop. How much better and superb exceptional contentwe’ve attempted to research and come up with, so hopefully you’ll discover unique and famous pick up lines which will be something you sense out of it, attempt to take it and pass on to others simply for the sake of comedy and fun.

Most human beings find bathroom jokes humorous, even Mozart! With that in mind, we got down to get all of the first-class poop puns and we constantly observe through! So here’s a actual scoop for you – all of the finest poop jokes in a single place (does that make it a poop scoop?) Enjoy our series of humorous poop jokes and puns.

Cheeky Poop pick Up Lines

While the subject may be a bit unconventional, a well-placed poop joke or pick-up line can be surprisingly funny and a surefire way to lighten the mood. It’s important to remember that humor can be subjective, and not everyone will appreciate toilet humor. So use these lines carefully, and make sure they’re delivered with a cheeky grin. Here are 20 poop-related pick-up lines and jokes for when you’re feeling a bit brave and a lot hilarious.

Pick-Up Lines:

  1. “Are you a toilet? Because I can’t hold it in when I’m around you.”
  2. “Are you a plumber? Because I can’t seem to flush you out of my mind.”
  3. “Are you a bathroom? Because when I see you, I feel relief.”
  4. “Are you toilet paper? Because I want you around when things get messy.”
  5. “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? I need to pass gas.”

Jokes:

  1. Why don’t poop jokes ever get old? Because they always crack you up.
  2. What’s brown and sounds like a bell? Dung!
  3. Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? To get to the bottom!
  4. What did one piece of poop say to the other? “You crack me up!”
  5. Why was the poop so good at making decisions? Because it always went with its gut feeling.

More Pick-Up Lines:

  1. “Are you a fart? Because you’ve blown me away.”
  2. “Are you a septic tank? Because I’m overflowing with feelings for you.”
  3. “Are you a laxative? Because you’ve got my heart running.”
  4. “Do you have a name, or can I call you mine? Because I’ve got a gut feeling about you.”

More Jokes:

  1. Why did the poop go to the party? Because it was a blast!
  2. Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack.
  3. What did the poop say to the fart? “You blow me away!”
  4. Why don’t toilets ever get lost? They always know where to go.

More Pick-Up Lines:

  1. “Are you a colon? Because I can’t function without you.”
  2. “Are you a diaper? Because I’m falling ‘poo-over-heels’ for you.”

Potty humor isn’t for everyone, but when used at the right moment, these lines can evoke laughter and break the ice. If your audience has a good sense of humor and doesn’t mind a little toilet talk, these poop pick-up lines and jokes can add a touch of color to your conversations. Just remember to keep things light, fun, and respectful!

In honor of all of the pooping that incorporates parenthood, we have got rounded up our favourite poop jokes that sound like they have been stimulated through real-lifestyles parenting situations, from new child blowouts to potty education meltdowns. Pick your favorites, proportion them at your subsequent playdate, and do not forget to pack more diapers.

  • The universe doesn’t give a shit about you, but I do.  
  • What did one toilet say to the other? “You look flushed.”  
  • What do cows call poop? Moo-nure.  
  • Why does Piglet always smell bad? Because he plays with Pooh.  
  • What’s the difference between good and bad toilet paper? One is terrible, and one is tearable.   
  • People who tell you they’re constipated are full of crap.  Children are like farts. 
  • Your own are just about bearable, but everyone else’s are horrendous.  
  • Why did the man bring toilet paper to the party? He’s a party pooper.  
  • I like toilets for two reasons. Number one and number two.  
  • What did the bottle of conditioner do to the toilet? Shampooed.   
  • What’s big, brown, and behind the wall? Humpty’s dump.  
  • Two rolls of toilet paper walked into a bar. One rolled out.  
  • How do you say “fart” in German? Farfrompoopin.  
  • If pooping is the call of nature… Is farting like a missed call?  
  • Why did the lady stop telling poop jokes? Everyone told her that they stink.  
  • Why do ducks have feathers? To cover their butt quacks.  
  • Poop jokes aren’t my favorite. But they’re a solid number two.  
  • Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably crap.  
  • You never really appreciate what you’ve got until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.  
  • What’s the definition of surprise? A fart with a lump in it. 
  • Which movie is always the worst of the trilogy? The turd one.  
  • What’s brown and firm? the Brown Family Law Firm.  
  • Poop is a crap palindrome.  
  • What did you get when you mix castor oil with holy water? A religious movement.  
  • Where do bees go to the bathroom? The BP station.  
  • Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your genes.  
  • Why can’t you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom? Because the “p” is silent.  
  • What’s your favorite cartoon? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turdles.  
  • I bought a toilet brush yesterday, but I’ve gotta say… 
  • I prefer toilet paper.  
  • What do you get when you combine a Sham-Wow and a Snuggie? A reason to pee in your pants.  
  • People say love is the best feeling ever. But I think finding a toilet when you’re having diarrhea is better.  
  • How do you make a house made of dung smell better? Use pooporri!  
  • When does Denzel Washington have to hang out with the Rugrats? Potty Training Day.  
  • What do you call a magical poop? Poodini.  

Also checkout WORST Pick Up Lines

Cheeky Poop pick Up Lines
Cheeky Poop pick Up Lines

Poop Puns that Definitely Don’t Stink

Today, we have tried to come up with all of the Poop Pick Up Lines and it is going to be an excessive amount of fun for a few people and for others, there might be too much of comedy hawk and which may be vain for people because we’ve got loads of pick up lines on poop. How much better and superb exceptional contentwe’ve attempted to research and come up with, so hopefully you’ll discover unique and famous pick up lines which will be something you sense out of it, attempt to take it and pass on to others simply for the sake of comedy and fun.

  • How do you get the bathroom unlocked in a hurry? With a doo-key.   
  • What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? “I’m feeling really wiped.”   
  • I need to buy a new toilet bowl. The one I have is full.  
  • What do women and toilet paper have in common? They both deal with a lot of crap.   
  • Have you seen the movie Diarrhea? It leaked, so they had to release it early.   
  • Wanna hear a poop joke? Nah, they always stink.   
  • The person who originally said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never had diarrhea.  
  • Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? To get to the bottom.  
  • Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet? To look for Pooh!   
  • What do you call a planet that poops? Uranus.   
  • Customer: “Waiter, what’s this fly doing in my soup?” Waiter: “Pooping.”  
  • What’s the best snack to eat while watching a movie that stinks? Poopcorn.  
  • What is a piece of poop’s favorite dance move? Poopin’ and locking.  
  • When is the best time to go to the restroom? Poo-thirty.  
  • I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday. Then I had the biggest vowel movement ever.  
  • Have you seen the new movie, Constipated? It hasn’t come out yet.  
  • Wanna hear a poop joke? Nevermind. It’s too corny.  
  • Why doesn’t Chuck Norris ever flush the toilet? He scares the poop out of it.  
  • Why don’t people take their phones into the bathroom? They don’t want to give away their IP address.  
  • What did Spock find in the Enterprise toilet? The Captain’s Log.  
  • What’s a surfer’s second greatest fear? A shart attack.  
  • Do clown farts smell funny?  
  • When Queen Elizabeth farts, is it considered a noble gas?  
  • What’s brown and sounds like a bell? Dung.  
  • How do you help a man with constipation? You pull the sh*t out of him.  
  • What do you call a bathroom superhero? Flush Gordon.  
  • What do you get when you poop in your overalls? Dung-arees.  
  • Why is the toilet a good place for a nap? It’s in the restroom.  
  • Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack.  
  • Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken next to him farted.  
  • What does Superman call his bathroom? The Super bowl.  
  • Stop making me laugh. You’ll make me puma pants.   
  • What did the fast-food worker say to the toilet? “Did you order a number two? I have one ready for you.”  
  • Parent’s truth: The further you are from the bathroom, the more urgently your kid needs to poop.  
  • What do special effects designers call bowel movements? They’re called 3-D farts.  
  • What did one toilet paper say to the next? “You’re on a roll!”  
  • My love for you is like diarrhea. I can’t hold it in.   
  • What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? Salad shooter.   
  • It helps me stay in touch with my inner self.   
  • What is a fart?A lonely cry from an abandoned turd.  
  • What do you call a fairy in the bathroom? Stinkerbell.  
  • Did you hear about the constipated composer? He had problems with his last movement
Poop Puns that Definitely Dont Stink
Poop Puns that Definitely Dont Stink

Best Poop Jokes

Gone are the times you needed to stifle your giggle in elegance or in the front of your mom due to the fact a person passed gas. This is your time to giggle hard and valiantly because poop jokes have been and would constantly be hilarious. We understand that pooping is a bit gross to speak about or carry up on the dinner table, however laughing about the matters that come out of our our bodies has constantly had its personal unique brand of comedy. We’ve acknowledged this when you consider that we have been youngsters and they’re simply as humorous these days as they have been then. We need that will help you reconnect to that child so you can also additionally in the future pass it on

  • Wanna hear a poop joke? Nah, they always stink.  
  • Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? To get to the bottom.  
  • What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? “I’m feeling really wiped.”  
  • What do women and toilet paper have in common? They both deal with a lot of crap.  
  • Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet? To look for Pooh!  
  • What did one toilet say to the other? “You look flushed.”  
  • Why did the man bring toilet paper to the party? He’s a party pooper.  
  • Why do ducks have feathers? To cover their butt quacks.  
  • What did the bottle of conditioner do to the toilet? Shampooed.  
  • How do you say “fart” in German? Farfrompoopin.  
  • Why did the lady stop telling poop jokes? Everyone told her that they stink.  
  • Why does Piglet always smell bad? Because he plays with Pooh.  
  •  People who tell you they’re constipated are full of crap.
  • A little boy is walking down the country road one day when he comes across a man who has a truckload of cow manure. 
  • The boy asks him what he’s going to do with all that cow poop. 
  • The man says, “I’m taking it home to put on my strawberries.”  
  • The little boy looks up at the man and says, “I don’t know where you come from, but where I’m from we put cream and sugar on our strawberries.”  
  • What’s the definition of surprise? A fart with a lump in it.  
  • Where do bees go to the bathroom? The BP station.  
  • Why can’t you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom? Because the “p” is silent.  
  • Her: “That’s disgusting!” Me: “Sorry, sometimes I like to poop with the door open.” Her: “You shouldn’t be pooping in the car at all.”  
  • When is the best time to go to the restroom? Poo-thirty.  
  • Why don’t people take their phones into the bathroom? They don’t want to give away their IP address.  
  • What’s a surfer’s second greatest fear? A shart attack.  
  • What do you call a bathroom superhero? Flush Gordon.  
  • Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack.  
  • What does Superman call his bathroom? The Super bowl.  
  • What did the fast-food worker say to the toilet? “Did you order a number two? I have one ready for you.”  
  • What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? Salad shooter.  
  • What do you call a magical poop? Poodini.  
  • What do you call a fairy in the bathroom? Stinkerbell.  
  • Do clown farts smell funny?  
  • Poop is a crap palindrome.  
  • A man asks his girlfriend’s father for permission to marry his daughter. 
  • “Are you kidding me? You’re so poor, you can’t even afford to buy her toilet paper!” scoffs the father. 
  • “True,” says the man. “But, I’d never marry a girl that full of crap.”  
  • Why did the cop sit on the toilet? To do his duty.  
  • Why did they install a toilet in the garbage heap? Everyone had to take a dump. 
  • Stop making me laugh. You’ll make me puma pants.  
  • When bears poop in the woods, is the smell unbearable?  
  • Parent’s truth: The further you are from the bathroom, the more urgently your kid needs to poop.  
  • Have you seen the new movie, Constipated? It hasn’t come out yet.  
  • To everyone out there suffering from constipation… I sincerely hope you have a really sh*tty day.  
  • I tried to explain to my four-year-old son that it’s perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. But he’s still making fun of me.  
  • I was going to tell you another poop joke, but it’s too crappy.  
  • A little old man who’s hard of hearing goes to see the doctor. Since he can’t hear very well, he takes his wife with him. The doctor examines the man and says, 
  • “I think we need to take a stool sample, a urine sample, and a sperm sample.” The old man turns to his wife and asks, “What did he say?” The wife replies, “He said he wants your underwear. 
Best Poop Jokes 1
Best Poop Jokes 1

Shitty Pick Up Lines

Even if shitty humor wasn’t your issue earlier than turning into a parent, poop jokes are a brilliant manner to live guffawing via all the pooping that incorporates parenthood. Don’t accept as true with us? Just try telling one in every of these.

  • I wish you were a septic tank,  Cause I want to pump the shit out of you.   
  • Damn i shit my pants, can i get in yours?  
  • Babe, you smell like shit, sorry!  
  • I’m gonna disrupt the shit out of your technology.  
  • Damn Subaru, you Impreza the shit out of me!  
  • If you were a bird and i was a bird  Would you fly around and shit on cars with me?  
  • Hey baby i just shit my pants  Can i get in yours?  
  • Hey girl I just shit my pants  Mind if I get in yours  Did it hurt?  
  • When you fell from someone’s ass and hit the toilet, you piece of shit  
  • Are you a Stephen King novel?  
  • Because you thick as hell and scare the shit out of me  
  • If you were an item at an Indian restaurant, you would have three chillies next to your name…  
  • Because you make me shit myself!  
  • Hey are you a Star Wars fan?  Cuz Yoda one I’m trynna fuck the shit out of tonight  
  • Are you a toilet?  Because you look like shit today.  
  • Hey girl are you a piece of shit? Cause I’d like to slide down your pants.  
  • Are your parents assholes?  Because you’re the shit.  
  • Dang, your so hot if you ate bread you would shit toast  There it is  
  • Damn girl, you shit with that ass?  
  • I’m married so you know I won’t be all clingy and shit!  
  • Are you a pickle  Cause that’s the funniest shit I’ve ever seen  
  • Are you a toilet in a burning church?  Because holy shit you’re hot!  
  • Hey girl are you constipated  Because I want to fuck the shit out of you  
  • You can call me shit, cause I wanna be all up in that ass.  
  • I just shit my bed  Can we share yours?  
  • Excuse me, I just shit my pants.  Can I get into yours?  
  • Hey girl, can I sleep in your bed? I shit in mine  
  • Damn girl, do you eat ass?  Cause your breath smells like shit!  
  • Hey babe, is your dad a farmer?  because I want to shit in your mouth.  
  • Are you a massive brick wall?  Because I’d shit down the government to have you  
  • Baby with a booty like that,  I’d follow a mile of your shit, just to see where it came from.  
  • Roses are red. Violets are bule.  Excuse me, miss? Can I fuck the shit outta you?  
  • Can you solve a debate for me?  
  • I think I’m an 8/10 but my friend thinks I’m more of a 7/10. What do you think?  
  • I thought I’d ask you because you look like a solid 10 and you probably know your shit.
Shitty Pic Up Lines
Shitty Pic Up Lines

Hilarious Poop Puns

“What is THAT?” is a not unusualplace refrain from dad and mom after they first deliver their valuable little one home. Newborn poop may be a wondrous and disgusting thriller, continuously changing shape, color and texture, and giving us lots of factors to Google and freak out about. So right here are some poop jokes that sound a bit like they have been made up via way of means of an exhausted discern after that they had modified one too many thriller diapers. Hopefully they help you with a smile through the ache of changing but any other leaky diaper at four a.m.

  • Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary?  It runs in your genes.  
  • I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday.  Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever.  
  • Have you seen that new movie Constipated?  It’s not come out yet.  
  • And have you seen the sequel, Diarrhea?  
  • It leaked so they had to release it early.  
  • People who tell you that they’re constipated are full of crap.  
  •  Laughter is the best medicine.  Unless you have diarrhea…  
  • Did you hear about the constipated composer?  He had problems with his last movement.  
  • A man was sitting at a bar one day when a pirate walked in. The pirate had a wooden leg, a hook for one hand, and a patch over one eye.  
  • Feeling sorry for the pirate, the man said, “Come over here, my friend. You look as though you’ve had a tough life and I’d like to buy you a drink.”  
  • The pirate gladly went over to the man who ordered him a rum.  
  • Then the man asked the pirate, “I’m curious, how did you lose your leg?”  
  • “Arrrgh!” said the pirate, “I lost that timber to a tiger shark in the Caribbean when I was thrown overboard for stealing a man’s rum.”  
  • “Wow, that’s awful!” said the man. “And tell me, how did you lose your hand?”  
  • “Arrrgh!” replied the pirate, “I lost that fighting cannibals on a treasure island.”  
  • “Oh my word!” the man said, “How awful! And tell me, how did you lose your eye?”  
  • The pirate said, “Arrrgh! A seagull pooped in it!”  
  • “A seagull!” The man was surprised. He asked, “Is seagull poop dangerous?!”  
  • The pirate said, “Nay, matey, it was me first day with the hook.”  
  • Do clown farts smell funny?  
  • A little boy is walking down the country road one day when he comes across a man who has a truck load of cow manure.  The boy asks him what he’s going to do with all that cow poop.  The man says, “I’m taking it home to put on my strawberries.”  The little boy looks up at the man and says, “I don’t know where you come from, but where I come from we put cream and sugar on our strawberries.”  
  • Did you hear about the constipated accountant?  He couldn’t budget.  
  • Did you know that when you say the word “poop”, your mouth does the same motion as your bum hole?  
  • The same is true for the phrase, “explosive diarrhoea”.  
  • You never really appreciate what you’ve got until it’s gone.  Toilet paper is a good example.  
  • People say love is the best feeling ever.  But I think finding a toilet when you’re having diarrhea is better.  
  • Parent’s Law: The more distance you are from a toilet, the more urgently your child will need to poop.  
  • I went into a public toilet for a poop the other day. I’d just sat down when I heard a voice from the next cubicle say, “Hi, how are you?”  I was a little embarrassed but I replied, “I’m fine thanks.”   
  • Then the voice asked, “So what are you up to?” I replied, “Just doing the same as you, sitting here.”  Then the voice asked, “Can I come over?”  Annoyed, I said, “Actually, I’m a little busy right now.”  The voice then said, “Listen, I’ll have to call you back, there’s an idiot next door who keeps answering all my questions.”  Poop Chat Up Line: My love for you is like diarrhea. I can’t hold it in.  
Hilarious Poop Puns
Hilarious Poop Puns

Poop Euphemisms

  • Barbarians at the gate.
  • Log an entry.
  • Leaving a load.
  • Launch a Butt Shuttle.
  • Make a deposit at the porcelain bank.
  • Drop the kids off at the pool.
  • Taking a steam pile.
  • Drop a deuce.
  • Float a trout.
  • Drop the kids off at the pool.
  • Park some bark.
  • Drop a dookie
  • Punish the porcelain.
  • Offload some freight.
  • Pinch a loaf.
  • Hit paydirt.
  • Chop a log.
  • Do the royal squat.
  • Lay a brick.
  • Make room for lunch.
  • Launch a torpedo.
  • Launch a butt shuttle.
  • Bomb the bowl.
  • Bake a loaf

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